Enough

ENOUGHIt’s been a funny little four-day week.  I had a lovely long ‘to-do’ list all lined up.  For starters, I had the whole of the Bank Holiday Monday all to myself – so I was going to power through a course I’ve signed up to.

I was also going to push ahead with some book marketing, start work on the new book, kick-start some exercise and healthy eating, and go to bed early every single night.

But things didn’t quite go to plan.  I had a lovely bank holiday weekend with friends and family, but Monday’s plans got shelved as family plans took precedence. The poorly pooch got very poorly on Tuesday so all of Tuesday’s plans got shelved whilst I ferried him to and from the Vet and spent time looking after him. I still shudder when I think of Wednesday night and ‘spider-gate – eek!  (I caught him in the end, but it was a long, fraught night).  The rest of the week went on in the same vein, and all my book-related plans have come to naught.

And you know what – that’s ok.  Although writing is what I love to do, being with the people I love is even more important.  What I am choosing (with the help of the fabulous Judith Morgan) is not to feel guilty for not getting through my ‘to-do’ list each and every day of the week, or even week.

I’m pretty good at going with the flow.  What I’m not so good at, and am working on is letting go of the idea that I’ve somehow failed because I haven’t managed to do it all.  I haven’t been able to tend to ill pets, spend time with friends or family, hold down a day-job and still cover half of the course in a four-day week.  When I write that down, I see how silly I’m being.  But when I’m reshuffling my plans, there are definite moments of ‘I should be able to manage all this – what am I doing wrong?’.

And that’s what I want to share with you – I’m not doing anything wrong.  Neither are you.  We’re just doing what we can, with what we have, from where we are.  And that’s enough.  We are enough – you and I.  beautifully, chaotically, messily, lovingly enough.

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